This is Kind of Late News

I haven't done too much reading into this but there are folks out there that say President-elect Barack Obama might soon be the first President-eject. (YES, I totally made that word up myself. Thanks for asking!) I think this has gone all the way up to a really high court, maybe Supreme. I would do a little research but I'm totally not feelin' it right now. I know, annoying right?

Well, I just thought this entire thing was silly. These people are debating whether or not Obama was a U.S. citizen when he was born, or something like that. Completely ridiculous! Black people are not BORN anymore. Do your research people. It's like saying, "Mmm, this McDonald's chicken sandwich is so real and probably came from a real chicken that was born." Joke's on you, pal. Everybody knows that chicken was cloned and raised for one purpose: to be fucking delicious. In the same way, black people are created in labratories to be super specialized in one area. As a favor to you, I will list the specialized categories currently aiding our world today as well as a person that best fits that category:

• Athletics (Usain Bolt, Olympic Gold Medalist)
• Academia (Albert Einstein, not really black)
  
• Philantropy (Oprah Winfrey, black person)
• Comedy (Tracy Morgan, fucking genius)
• Politics (Denzel Washington as Malcom X, actor)
• Fashion (Tyra Banks, when I was young and she was hot)
• Music (Kanye West, check out his new album in stores now!)
• Food (Colonel Sanders, Kentucky Fried Chicken)
• Technology (Afro Ninja, YouTube celebrity)
  

I'm probably missing a few, but I think you get the general idea. Or, as my black people would say... actually, they would have probably said the same thing, except maybe a bit more eloquent. They're born lyricists, afterall.